In my 21 years of living I have never viewed sex as something I must have on daily basis. I’m either having it or I’m not. There’s no in-between for me were I sit in my room pulling my hair out with one hand while the other is positioned between my legs. I’ve never felt as if sex was a must have if I wanted a boyfriend to stay with me. I’ve yet to feel like sex is needed if I want a man to propose to me. Now I might feel as if sex is needed if I want my husband to stay with me, but that’s a subject that will be hit on years down the road.
Now to get into the topic of discussion. While having a conversation with some young ladies (younger meaning 16-18 years old) one was having a slight fear that she might be pregnant due to her being sick for almost a week. Her illness included a ridiculous fever and nausea. She said the last time she had sex was early June. The first thing I said to her was, “I thought you broke up with your boyfriend last month. How’d you have sex in June?”
Yes I am that person. She looked at me with a look of “WTF?” before saying, “You don’t need to have a boyfriend to have sex.” Obvious I know, but still. The other young lady told me how she’d gone through a similar incident with me pitching in how they were too young to be doing the deed. “It just feels so good though.” 45 minutes of pleasure is worth nearly 40 weeks of carrying a baby that you’ll have to care for another 18 years? I must be missing something. It wasn’t until a 3 o’clock in the morning conversation with my boyfriend did I realize how much society has affected women and our views on the subject.
According to Stevie Harvey’s Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man a woman needs to have a 90 day grace period with a man before giving him the draws. I’m not sure if this 90 day grace period is during the courting phase or the actual dating phase, but regardless bless my boyfriend’s soul because both these times have come and gone. How can you tell a woman that if she wants to keep a man she needs to have sex with him 90 days (3 months) after they begin dating? How foul proof is this theory? Whose to say on day 91 that the women taking this advice won’t be crying in their pillow due to a call from their beau proclaiming he has no interest in being with her? Is this the new way to a man’s heart or to your own heartache?
The bigger question is if I have 20 different boyfriends and date all of them for a minimum of 3 months should I have sex with all 20 of them? Well you only need to do that if you feel they’re worthy. So we can tell if someone is worthy of sex after just 3 months? I didn’t even know my boyfriend’s favorite color was
red blue until about 4 months into the game. Can I not hold out for another 90 days bringing my grand total to 180 days of waiting without him leaving me? I’m pretty sure there are some guys saying “Hell no!” I’ve heard my fair share of men say if they’re not getting any they can take their good services (dinner, listening to your constant nagging, etc.) elsewhere where they’ll be welcomed with open legs.
So what if I abide by the 90 Day Rule and make the decision to have sex with only partners deemed worthy? That may narrow my 20 boyfriends down to 15 sexual partners. Which according to society is a lot for a woman to have. How can I be encouraged to have sex so soon, but labeled a whore and damaged goods if I follow the 90 Day Rule?
- Me: Chileeeeeee Kelly Rowland just KILLED that performance. Her performance was really sexy to me.
- Boyfriend: That's what they saying on Twitter...I know she bad though #Winning. You took some pointers from her??? LOL
- Me: >.<